bigger is better?
06-02-04.19:21

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last night i was at work and while i was standing on the viewside of elevator 5 on the 112th floor, i was thinking of how small things don't seem to last but count and big things last and make their mark.

most small cars count as cars cause they need to be registered but big cars last longer--generally speaking.

but then there's nothing more special than your first car no matter what kind it was. then of course you find something better and move on.

most small businesses count and show signs of making a difference but get big if successful and then last not forever but significantly enough to be accounted for.

okay okay i was thinking in terms of love. from a point of view that is most obvious...the love you have for someone has to be big for it to outgrow obstacles for it to last. the bigger the love the better chance for survival. duh! (scratching head) then i began to think of how big this world is and the age of this home we have called earth, and how big it may seem to us but it really is a pebble compared to the rest of the universe. now i wonder, is the size of love really proportional to it's existance? when the size of something depends on the point of view of the person sizing it?

i took a nap this afternoon and had a very disturbing dream. i was driving in this white trailer pulling a car with a man i didn't see his face but from what i felt in the dream it was ryan. we were on some freeway and i knew there was an accident about to happen and i told him and as the accident happened we were able to avoid it with minimal damage to our vehicle. we got out and decided to help the other people in the accident but in doing so we had to climb this bridge and as we got up there were two narrow paths made of both wood and stone. i let ryan go ahead first to cross (we both took the right side) and just as he made it through, the bridges got flooded with water where if i stepped on the bridge i would be submerged in water. of course i can't swim! so i got scared, but i began to cross anyway. and the water rose up to my chest where i slipped and began to drown. and then my mom showed up out of no where with these boots and told me that i can do it and she held my hand and pushed me through to get to the other side....and my phone rang and i woke up.

thinking...

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