f_a_l_l_e_n
smile
03-17-04.12:05


dang i skipped a week. i guess i had somuch to say that i decided not to say it. i'm getting tired of my template...i'll soon find time to change that. i haven't even played ffx2 in a while. yeah time to change my template. where do i begin? the weather has been changing...it's getting warmer and themoths prove this change, so does my cold.

last week...was exhausting both at work and at home. i was pushed at work...long story...i'm actaully proud of myself of the way i handled it. in a non-violent way. but somethings eating me up inside still...

"to make a long story short, don't tell it." anonymous

"you have yet to feel my rage..." deliver us from eva

"i ain't mad at'cha! got nuthin but love." 2pac

believe me these sayings help me get by.

at home all of us just got the cold at the same time, and me and ryan went out...'wink-wink' then waking up early to go to dmv. yes! my car is registered! just waiting for my plates in the mail...who says you can't make up for lost sleep? i sure know i can, but lately i've been having trouble sleeping. could it be my clogged nose? my head that won't stop thinking? my heart that won't stop beating? 'sappiness @#$!'

i realized when i signed that peice of paper about the jewelry policy at work i might have waived my rights on freedom of speech. now for thosee of you reading this don't get any ideas...cause i have all of them before you even think of it. 'swipe in- swipe out' that's all i go to work for, my numerically challenged paycheck. i don't know why even when i used to work elsewhere or in school i am always accused of putting things in people's minds, having spies and brainwashing...all i know is i live an honorable life. no double standards. if i give you my word no matter what the consequences are i will live up to it. i tell the truth even it hurts. i say how i feel and what i think to whoever asks. if someone comes to me for advice i give them both honest and dishonest and its up to them to choose which path they will take. and on any situation i always have ability to look at it from both sides. this is why i know my friends respect me at a certain level. 'woooow' am i brainwashing you right now?

we have that evacuation thing on the 25th...'BIG sigh' gotta be on my day off.

Smile

by Tamia

Sometimes I sit at home and wonder how it'd be If he had loved me Truly loved me yes I learned a while ago that kind of thing Never happens for me And so I go around And just pretend Loving life for me I play the circus clown around my friends Make them laugh and they won't see That you never let them see you sweat Don’t want them to think the pain runs deep Lord knows it's killing me

So I put on my make-up Put a smile on my face And if anyone asks me Everything is okay I’m laughing cause no one Knows the joke is on me Cause I’m dying inside With my pride and a smile On my face

Sing it la la la la

Sometimes I sit at home By the phone hoping he might call me But he don't call me But then I realize Dreams come true aren't for girls like me Not like me And so I go around with my head up Like it ain't no thing And when the boys around with all my friends I’m into other things Because you never let them see you sweat Don’t want them to think the pain runs deep Lord knows it's killing me

It’s not an easy (thing)Sometimes it’s hard to (face the truth)It’s not the life that I would choose (that I would choose)But what else can I do? If he don’t love me If he don’t want me I’m not about to sit around Let myself go

Almost Doesn't Count

"Almost made you love me Almost made you cry Almost made you happy, baby Didn't I, didn't I You almost had me thinkin' You were turned around But everybody knows Almost doesn't count

Almost heard you saying You were finally free What was always missing for you, babe You'd found it in me But you can't get to heaven Half off the ground Everybody knows Almost doesn't count

I can't keep lovin' you One foot outside the door I hear a funny hesitation Of a heart that's never really sure Can't keep on tryin' If you're looking for more Than all I could give you Than what you came here for

Gonna find me somebody Not afraid to let go Want a no doubt be there kind of girl You came real close But everytime you built me up You only let me down And everybody knows Almost doesn't count

Maybe you'll be sorry Maybe you'll be cold Maybe you'll come running back, babe From the cruel, cruel world Almost convinced me You're gonna stick around But everybody knows (everybody knows!) Almost doesn't count

So maybe i'll be here Maybe I'll see ya' round That's the way it goes Almost doesn't count

<<-.->>

missed...
just a test - 12-18-04
consequence - 12-18-04
2004 burdei - 12-08-04
stacked - 11-17-04
kinda rainy - 08-22-04